Monday, 1 February 2016

I'm Sorry, Does My Beauty Threaten You?

Monday, 1 February 2016

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Picture this:

You're walking down the street and suddenly you're stopped dead in your tracks as a dazzling ray of beauty enters your vision.

She's everything that the magazine covers look like. She's the epitome of everything you want to be. Tall, skinny, blonde hair. Maybe she's curvy with great boobs and a fabulous mocha tan. And she definitely squats.

Whatever your personal preference, or idea of beauty might be, we've all experienced the feeling of all-consuming envy when you see another person who appears to be 'perfect' and has it all.

It doesn't matter whether they were a stranger passing you on your commute to work, a classmate on your course, or someone who always manages to look immaculate at the gym. We've all experienced that insane jealousy over that person we didn't even know (or at least, not personally), and we've judged the hell out of them too.

Don't try to deny it! We all, deep down, like to believe we're good, non-judgmental, kind individuals, but the truth is, we have been built this way. Evolution has programmed us to, essentially, 'seek out the competition'. So don't be too hard on yourself.


That said, I think there's a very fine line between an initial moment of judgment which we later regret after realising that the hot girl we thought would be really conceited and superficial is actually a total sweetheart. Or, the douchebag guy who walks around acting like he's it and lifts weights on a daily basis is actually pretty down to earth and has some body confidence issues. There is a fine line between this momentary judging and hate and actually getting to know someone for who they are, flaws and all, and still deciding to hate them and berate them because of how they look.


Now, I'm not saying I'm innocent in this matter. In fact, I'm pretty guilty. There has been many occasions in the past where I've judged a person based on their appearance before I even got to know them, and made some pretty nasty, shallow assumptions about them.

But, a friend of mine (without naming names) recently encountered somebody who absolutely felt threatened by her beauty. My friend is sweet, modest, gorgeous of course, but in no way is she untrustworthy. And the sad thing is, one of her so-called 'friends' actually put her down behind her back, all because she believes her boyfriend is liable to being stolen away (seriously)?

It's a sad truth to realise that one of your friends may not be as much of a friend as you intially thought. And it's even sadder when, out of their own insecurity and immaturity, attempt to 'dim your shine' so they can somehow brighten theirs. But maybe we can all learn something from this.

Confident, happy people don't put others down, and they certainly don't judge them. And if you feel the need to do this even after you've gotten to know whoever it is you're experiencing a tinge of jealousy with, maybe you need to look closer at yourself and your own confidence/relationship issues and insecurities to come to terms with why you're really feeling that way.

Next time you see an attractive person - or even someone you don't find particularly attractive - resist with every bone in your body to judge them. Don't let yourself be threatened by others' beauty, and don't convince yourself that you know they're a bad person before you've even given them a chance to introduce themselves.

We could all learn a lesson from this smart pug!

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